By contributing writer Alexandra Maul of Made to Glow
“Be a warrior, not a worrier.”
I came across that quote while on a 5-hour plane delay on route to facilitate and present at a high-pressure business meeting. I was already very nervous, overworked, and exhausted from long weeks of preparation. I’m not a huge fan of public speaking and the travel issues weren’t helping.
My mind was buzzing with worry…
What if I don’t arrive in time? What if the meeting doesn’t go well? Now I won’t get enough sleep, what if I’m too tired? Will this stress push my body over the edge and cause me to get sick? I can’t get sick, I have too much to do! I’m supposed to be handling my stress better and healing my adrenals and hormones, this is going to set me back for sure, how will I ever get better?!
I could feel my muscles tensing, my jaw clenching, my stomach rumbling, and a headache coming on.
I decided I had to get a grip and made myself start my go-to stress relief practices. I took a deep breath and started to flip through a magazine when my eyes caught on a quote – be a warrior, not a worrier. Something about that saying, “be a warrior,” resonated with me.
It really struck me as an opportunity to change my thinking and reframe the worrying.
To actually stop the fretting in its tracks.
Worrying is usually due to fear of uncertainty… of the unknown.
Our minds go directly to the ‘what-ifs’ and that cycle of thinking can be consuming, and is definitely not good for our wellbeing.
To me, it’s about the lack of control. I am a planner and I like to be prepared, and when something is unknown, it makes me uneasy. But the reality is that anything can happen, and when it does, we are equipped to deal with it.
That’s where this mantra really hits home for me.
Being a warrior, and not a worrier puts the confidence and power back in YOU. Whatever happens, you will be able to deal with it.
A warrior triumphs, a worrier cowers. This notion of strength and resilience is empowering. We need to have more confidence that we can and will conquer whatever gets thrown at us.
It’s about trusting in yourself that you will handle whatever comes your way.
And that calms my fears, even if just for a moment. And then I repeat the mantra and breathe.
I’m also finding that writing memoir of my life from the perspective of my younger self, giving her safe place to share, say everything I was afraid to do (for good reasons back then) is helpful too. In truth, am finding that that youngest part of me is the wisest. or rather that is where I knew the most about life. I just need to reconnect with that wise child and empower her, Give this part of me back her voice. for me I have flipped flopped between being a warrior and a worrier, neither one of those really worked for me. both wore me out in different ways. mainly because I lacked clarity in either one. so First step for me is to stop and get clarity about what is really going on. My wise little wee one is the best part of me that sees clearly what is going on around me. It is a joy to reconnect with this innocent, wise way of being alive.
Fantastic quote! I’m also a planner who starts to feel anxious when things aren’t going according to plan (unless my plan is to have no plan, which interestingly makes me feel okay about whatever comes — but that’s not possible on a business trip). I’ll definitely pull up this quote the next time I start feeling that way. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you, Kariane! Happy to hear it resonates with you.
DAVID ALAN JONES RIDGE
I would suggest that you add a phrase to this quote about being a worker. Example:
Be a warrior
Not a worrier
I used to feel constant level of anxiety, worry almost all the time. I used all sorts of techniques to try to get rid of it. with limited short term relief. I stumbled upon better way to address this, through journaling. I befriend the part of me feeling worried, and give her the talking stick, through journaling. I’ve discovered that by giving this part of me space to share her concerns, I can address them with wisdom that I know now that settles this old worry. and this is dissolving my worry habits for good. I found out that my worry was fueled by a couple of false beliefs, and getting them out in the open through the above journalling practice dissolved my worry. Now I hardly feel anxiety, worry. and when I do it is manageable, normal daily level.
That’s wonderful, Evelyn. Journaling is an incredibly valuable stress reduction technique. I used to do it on and off, and now you’ve inspired me to take it up again. Thank you!